Upon waking this morning and surveying the pantry stock, I realized we had nothing for breakfast. n o t h i n g. Out comes the bread maker, in goes the ingredients for 1-hour bread. Breakfast will be later than usual but it will be warm and yummy.

Changing plans is never fun for me, especially when it cancelling things. Canceling things with friends is worse. I don't like it at all.

My baby doesn't sleep well. She has gone through cycles of sleep habits, from a high of waking only once or twice briefly, to a low of only sleeping when she in in my arms and I'm walking her around. The highs were in the 3-4 months after she was born and then again around 8-10 months of age. We've been in a low now for about a month, with varying amounts of night waking. The last week has been the bottom of the barrel low - with her sleeping from 7-9 PM and that's pretty much it. Co-sleeping doesn't work for us, because if Lauren is in my arms she wants to be moving. Laying down doesn't cut it. But three nights ago, in my middle of the night haze I felt the Lord reminding me to enjoy snuggling my little girl. She's almost one, you know. Almost done with rocking and middle-of-the-night feeding sessions. Lauren will move on to toddler things and leave her baby stages behind. So I'm trying to enjoy these nights of snuggles and days of rocking her through a cold and teething. At times, I really don't enjoy it to be perfectly honest. I want to crawl into bed and go to sleep. But I can sleep in 10 years. In this moment, my baby needs me. And I need to enjoy her. Because we'll be celebrating her loose teeth and basketball victories before I can blink, just like we do for my almost-7-year-old biggest girl. I can't grab time and ask it to slow down so I just have to hold on and enjoy what I've got. Even if it is in a sleep-deprived blur.

Colds. Runny noses. Coughs. Yucky. We're almost through this one, I think. Wiping down doors, faucets, phones and television remotes has become commonplace. Any time the sun shines and its over 25 degrees, the heat gets turned down and the windows get opened up. I'm sure that fresh air - no matter how cold - is helping. School work is down to the basics. Chores are staying on schedule, simply because I refuse to allow the first week of our new cleaning schedule to be ruined.

I'm letting go of organizing the closet in the toy/school room. The girls are responsible for keeping all toys inside the closet. Apart from that, I don't look in the closet. Okay, I try not to look so that I don't lose it because its a terrible mess. It works for us because they find what they want and I don't have to see toys shoved in the corners of the room. Letting go. Not reorganizing. Not nagging about the mess. Yep. Its not driving me mad knowing what a mess there is in the closet. Positive confessions, right?


  1. Jackie,
    Have you tried eliminating all caffeine out of your diet? (If you are still nursing Lauren.) I had to do that at about eight months with Kate. Steven could tell if I had had caffeine that day or not by how well she slept. It's hard to let go of the caffeine, especially if you aren't getting much sleep, but in the long run, it might be worth it.


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